I once told my therapist that I thought anxiety was just… life.
I said, “I’m anxious every day.”
To me, that was normal. I wasn’t falling apart, I was functioning. I had 2.5 jobs. I was keeping up with the demands (sort of). I was doing what Black women do — holding it down.
They looked at me, calm and clear, and said,
“Daily anxiety is not normal.”
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That moment was like someone finally popped the hood and showed me that I’d been driving with serious internal damage — and I’d never even looked for a warning sign. That’s how the idea for this “Check Engine Light” series was born.
But here’s what really changed my life:
A health scare forced me to stop.
I had no choice but to take time off — from work, from pressure, from being “on.” For the first time in what felt like forever, my only job was to rest. To heal. To be still.
And that stillness? It taught me everything.
People expected less from me because they knew I was going through something. My husband lowered his expectations because I was physically unwell. And when the world finally stopped pulling at me, I saw clearly how much I had been ignoring myself.
My mind, my body, and my emotions all began to shift. I felt things I hadn’t given myself space to feel. I noticed how quiet my thoughts became when I wasn’t constantly pushing or performing. I remembered who I was without the pressure.
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That period of rest, isolation, and reflection changed me. It was the reset I didn’t know I needed — but now I don’t want to live without.
And the truth is, many Black women are in the same spot I was — running on fumes, normalizing anxiety, mistaking exhaustion for ambition, and missing the signs that something’s off. That we need help. That we deserve better.
This series is an invitation.
To pull over.
To pop the hood.
To ask questions about how you really feel.
So if you’ve been feeling “off” but can’t put your finger on it…
If you’ve been saying “I’m just tired” but never actually feel rested…
If you’ve been crying more, laughing less, or snapping at people and blaming yourself for not being able to “shake it off”…
This is your sign.
Your check engine light is on.
Let’s lift the hood together.
Great Job Kamron (Taylor) Melton & the Team @ Therapy for Black Girls Source link for sharing this story.
